chicago '08

2009-02-20T20:04:00.004-05:00

I've been busy. what can I say?

it's been a very eventful 6 weeks or so- the hardest and best of my life.

it started with my induction: over 36 hours of labor, 2 hours of pushing, and not a few stitches. then, as if we hadn't had a hard enough time of it, Celeste went to the NICU for 9 days. our time and contact with her were limited and we were devastated every time we had to leave the hospital to go home and sleep. I couldn't breastfeed, she was tiny, and we were never alone with her.

now, at 6 weeks, it's like we're living in a completely different world: she doesn't leave my side (except for date night!). she's a champion breastfeeder, a fat and healthy baby who grins at us. life couldn't be better. sure, I haven't slept since january 4 and I may not shower regularly, but that's seems inconsequential in the light of this awesome baby we made.

2008-12-20T10:06:00.004-05:00

Hugsband: I thought of a scam to get a free monkey.

Wifey: oh yeah?

Hugsband: you put up a front like you're running a monkey rescue and make a website with tons of pictures of happy, healthy monkeys who love your rescue. then, you wait for people to call and try to place their monkeys with you.

Wifey: but then wouldn't you get just reject monkeys, like old and sick ones?

Hugsband: no, you could say that you only have space for baby monkeys.

Wifey: I don't know how big the market is for baby monkey rescues. I am pretty sure you're going to get cancerous, feces-slinging, old monkeys.

Hugsband: Nay sayer.

(a couple of minutes later)

Hugsband: I thought of a scam to get a free snow blower.

Wifey: really? how about you think of a scam to get a xmas present for your mom?

2008-12-07T09:30:00.002-05:00

we started childbirth classes on thurs night. our class included a motley assortment of people of all demographics, including a girl who can't be older than 16 and at least one couple who are certainly older than us (phew!). this is the basic class offered by the hospital. they provide an overview of procedures, let you handle forceps and vacuum extractors, and show lots of birthing videos.

in this context of health education, I was very surprised to find the following snack offerings:

** packages of those bright orange crackers with peanut butter (OK, pretty gross and high in sodium, but at least there's some protein)

** PRINGLES STICKS (wtf??) in VANILLA flavor (seriously??)

dehydrated potatoes and artificial vanilla flavor, exactly what ShimSham's diet is lacking in.

I was very upset and distracted by this during the entire class.

as class progressed, Hugsband and I somehow caught a bad case of the giggles. we were the naughty kids in the back of the class. except, this wasn't junior year french class where it's perfectly acceptable to make fun of the instructor. this is an Extremely Important Class, and the teacher is the head labor & delivery nurse who has the power to deprive me of good care when I come in to deliver if she thinks I didn't take her class seriously. still, I had a hard time keeping my composure. at one point, the instructor showed a picture of infant twins dressed up like rats (from the Ann Geddes "images of horror" collection, I believe), and we both busted out laughing. I am sure the other students think that we're complete idiots.

2008-11-03T14:18:00.002-05:00

my 3-year old niece and I had a sleep-over on halloween. originally, she was supposed to sleep over at the museum where Hugsband works, along with her sister and parents, as part of a big annual halloween party. but we found out last week that she was too young to stay all night, so I picked her up and brought her back to our place while the others slept on the museum's marble floors. (frankly, I don't see the appeal. $55 each to sleep on the floor??)

anyway, my niece is very sweet and fun but naughty enough to be interesting. she's obsessed with make-up and princesses and beautiful things and seems genuinely confused by my limited grooming routine. she said a number of very funny things while she was here:

** (saturday morning 7am) "aunt Rachel, why don't you put on some lipstick and brush your hair to be beautiful?"
"nah."

** "I need some spray for my hair"
"I don't have any spray at my house and you don't need it. your hair is already pretty."
"the next time I come to visit you, I'll bring some. isn't that nice sharing?"

** "we should paint your fingernails"
"no"

** "do you want to wear something pink today?"
"no"

I shoot down all of her ideas to make me over, I never just say "yes" and always explain that I prefer a more realistic aesthetic when she asks whether I think her barbies are pretty, and I place ridiculous limits on her television viewing at my house.

And yet, somehow the kid is still nuts about me. I don't get it.

2008-10-22T20:29:00.003-04:00

it's been fun to watch children with autism respond to my pregnancy. while many of the kids I work with don't notice or mention it, a couple have had very strong reactions.

last night a boy who hadn't seen me in two weeks pointed at my abdomen and loudly asked, "WHAT IS THAT?" and before I could answer, he went on to state, "DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE MARRIED!"

the other day another little boy simply asked, "how did that happen?" after his dad told him that "dr. Rachel is having a baby." I decided not to take the physiological route when answering.

2008-09-28T09:12:00.005-04:00

here's a belly picture: me, ShimSham, and the giant tendon in my neck on top of montmartre.

we were in london last week for Ilona's wedding and spent a little time in paris. the wedding was beautiful, and we had an amazing time. here's a more accurate depiction of my behavior in paris avec un coronet de pamplemousse rose.

I was constantly eating something amazing while we were away, lots of great indian food in london and everything edible in paris.
it's hard to come home and eat leftovers after food like that!

by the way, here's what ShimSham looks like these days.

that thing floating above his/her belly is a cute little hand. aw.

2008-09-06T10:48:00.002-04:00

we went with Jake and some of Hugsband's coworkers to hear Andrew BIrd play in millenium park the other night. it was a great show, a real spectacle. Hugsband and I decided that it's pretty common to find musicians who are wacky OR talented, but he's a great combination of wacky AND talented in a brainy way that reminds me of David Byrne and TMBG.

I realized the other day that ShimSham, the fetus, will travel to NYC, london, and paris before being born. not bad, considering Shim's parents didn't have an opportunity to leave the country until after they were old enough to vote. pregnant travel is not glamorous, however. I have to wear "compression socks" (or as my grandma used to call them "rubber hose") so that I don't throw a clot on the plane. I just hope I remember to wear pants and not a skirt so that the rubber hose can be my little secret.

I flipped through a people magazine in the clinic at work the other day while I waited for my patient to show up. on the last page, there were two pictures of Jessica Alba. in the first, she was clearly pregnant. in the second, she was skinny again. the caption read "from pregnant to hot." because lord knows that those two categories are mutually exclusive.

after weeks of not getting around to it, we finally went to see the latest batman movie on the imax screen on labor day. Hugsband went all apeshit for it. me, not so much. I loved seeing chicago, which looked amazing, but I certainly prefer Tim Burton-style tomfoolery to all of this dark knight crap. how's that for a film review?

we're really starting to show

2008-08-02T13:58:00.003-04:00

2008-07-25T08:05:00.003-04:00

we went to walgreen's last night, and I discovered something CRAZY in the freezer section. there were 2 products I have never seen before that delighted and disgusted me: DWIGHT YOAKAM'S MAC & CHEESE MOUTH POPPERS and CHICKIN LICKIN PIZZA FRIES. the amazing thing is that these products are in the freezer case and meant to be eaten as food.

I didn't even know Dwight Yoakam had a food line, so that part was bizarre. when I think of him, which is quite rarely, it's as 'that country singer in swing blade'. so it was funny for that reason, and the completely unfoodlike nature of this food was amazing. I mean, where's the pizza fry part of the chicken? since we shop almost exclusively at trader joe's and "whole paycheck," I think I have been cut off from the world of gross junk food.

I sound so high and mighty knocking the junk food, but it was just a couple of nights ago that I made Hugsband take me to a local greasy spoon for a chocolate shake and fried zucchini after our real dinner.

it's like feast or famine around here. either I can't eat at all because everything sounds pukey, or I eat like a pig.

introducing... SHIM SHAM!

2008-07-20T21:13:00.005-04:00

I have been MIA because I have been trying to keep a secret... something I am not very good at.

Hugsband and I are having a baby, due february 3. when we started out our lives together over 12 years ago, we weren't sure that we'd ever want to have a kid. and yet here we are-- more excited than we've ever been about anything in our lives. sure, the nausea and fatigue suck, but I have never had such a cool thing to plan for!

here's Shim Sham's very first picture. taken this very afternoon:

I realize that this picture is one big blob, but you'll have to take my word for it that (s)he looks like (s)he's supposed to.

2008-06-16T18:17:00.003-04:00

it's not actually submitted just yet, but my first big fat research grant proposal is finally out of my hands and trying to make its way to the NIMH. (you know the evil NIMH, where those rats escaped from?) I have written a few piddly grants, but this was the first where the total budget exceeded a million. now I just have to wait FOREVER to see how the proposal was received.

I saw something very wrong on the ashland bus this morning. a woman was curling her eyelashes with a spoon. I can think of two things that I don't want to touch when I am on nasty public transportation: my eyes and eating utensils. and I especially don't want my eyes touching eating utensils.

it actually worked though. by the time she was finished with the spoon, she had worked up a nice curl.

2008-05-23T14:59:00.003-04:00

I use pandora a lot at work, especially when I am stuck at my desk working on reports. for the most part, it's a great way to hear new music, mixed with some of my old favorites. lately, however, pandora is sending me a lot of crap. it's so bad that I keep thinking of Patton Oswalt's bit about bad tivo. seriously, what is it about Edith Piaf and Andrew Bird that made you think that I wanted to hear stone temple pilots?

Hugsband is still away and seems to be having an amazing time. I occasionally get 1-2 line emails, sent via a satellite phone, that say things like "saw antillean nighthawk. love you." he'll be back tuesday night.

2008-05-17T10:23:00.003-04:00

Hugsband left to catch iguanas and snorkel in the exumas today. after dropping him at ohare, I went directly to the farmer's market and bought an obscene amount of produce. I bought all of the stuff he's not too crazy about like kale and arugula and spring onions. let me tell you-- when the cat is away the mouse goes TFN with the veg. my other plans for the next 10 days include watching horror-free movies and sleeping all willy-nilly in the bed. I feel old.

2008-04-27T11:09:00.001-04:00

brookfield zoo is not as awesome as you remember, but it's still fun.

aquarium people suck

2008-04-17T15:02:00.004-04:00

last night Hugsband told me, “you know new girl Jen at work? today she wore a t-shirt that said ‘gay? fine by me’.” I laughed aloud for several minutes. I was walking down the street by myself this morning, thought of it again, and burst out laughing. I mean, seriously, how foolish is that?

I suggested that Hugsband make her some more t-shirts so that she can announce her feelings about other groups.
‘black? I’m down with that.’
‘mexican? burritos are awesome.’
‘luthern? you make me uncomfortable.’

I also found it funny to imagine reactions she could get from gay people on the street. like, “oh my god, thank you so much! I have been waiting my whole life for a privileged white girl from the midwest to legitimize my existence.”
“thank goodness! I was afraid that we couldn’t be BFF’s.”

the other reason aquarium people suck, besides this ridiculous t-shirt, is because some of them get to go to the caribbean for 10 days to snorkle and catch iguanas and they don't even bring their wives. and they act like it's work and get paid for it and have to take days off when they get back, like, 'OMG, I worked so hard at my super challenging job and I even got a little sunburnt, so I am going to take 2 days off to recover.' duh.

2008-03-27T12:47:00.003-04:00

I haven't been reading as much lately. I have been very obsessed with radiolab podcasts. I listen to them on the el, which is better than reading because (a) I don't get motion sick like I tend to do while reading, (b) it's easy to do even if standing up, and (c) I can keep listening even after I get off the train. I am learning a lot of interesting factoids, and the topics are often related to psychological phenomena.

Hugsband and I are going to bourbonnais this weekend to my uncle's where we will refinish our dining room table. he has a lot of space and tools, and it should be much safer than working on it in our tiny, poorly ventilated apartment. the table currently has a dark finish. together with the very dark wood of our chairs, medium wood of the baseboards and door trim and the light wood of the floors, makes a menagerie of wood finishes. does that matter? I don't think so.

Hugsband has also been (SLOWLY) working on the kitchen. it's almost completely repainted. I now want to paint the backdoor bright red, and then we're set in that room! I think painting the kitchen was on our to-do list for october. it's amazing how hard it is to summon up the energy and motivation for home improvement projects when there are walks to take, books to read, and- in Hugsband's case- countless movies to watch.

spring is apparently here. I noticed that I can now get by with wearing a single pair of pants on my morning commute, instead of many.

Hugsband and I "babysat" my 15-year old "step-sister" back in august when my mom and Colin went on their brief honeymoon. it was a trying and traumatic time, but we somehow persevered and made it though. I thought most of the battle scars had healed until I tried to use my ichat program today. apparently, missamerica537 was the last user (I don't IM much) and had screwed up all of the settings so badly that I wasn't able to log in. the only hard and fast rule during her stay was NO IM'ING!! because she has been known to use it inappropriately to talk with men ('not on my watch!' I naively thought). she must have snuck during the night to use my computer because I closely monitored what she was doing during the day. I spent nearly 2 hours today messing with it and trying to regain control. to no avail! I was (am?) furious.

thank god that I am an adult with my own house because if I had to live with that child (or any female who uses "missamerica" as a username), I would go insane.

2008-03-10T21:38:00.004-04:00

when I finished running at the ymca today, I went to the gym to watch Hugsband's tae kwan do class. I hadn't seen him yet today and was surprised to see that he had shaved his beard and now sported a cop mustache. he was so impressed with himself that he had trouble keeping a straight face while going through his moves. I love watching Hugsband at TKD. he takes it VERY seriously. the others in the class are very quiet when they work. Hugsband, on the other hand, is downright rowdy. he makes a loud, confident "phish" sound each time he moves to strike. I laughed aloud last week when he forgot his routine and "phish"ed in a tentative, uncertain way. like "phish??"

not much else has been happening. I spin, Hugsband pretends to punch stuff, and we go to work.

other people's lives are interesting, though. we did take a trip to LA at the end of january. it was great to see our old friends. everyone seems happy and successful. our friends Bill and Steven were doing particularly well. they have an amazing house in the hills that always reminds me of the house they go to for the party in 'less than zero.' the pool has colored lights, there's a grotto, and the screening room rivals most movie theaters (plus, the snacks are free!!). the night we were at their home, they were hosting a terrible movie party. the guests bring the worst films they can find and then vote on which one to watch. during the film, everyone yells out comments. it was the most fun I have had in a very long time. Bill & Steven were preparing to host a party in mid-february, and the entire casts of dynasty and heroes agreed to come. I am not sure how that combination came to be. Steven was dying for some Joan Collins/Linda Evans drama, but aren't they awfully old to be throwing each other in the pool. a man can't help but dream, though.

2 nieces + 2 days= 2 exhausted

2007-12-28T08:37:00.001-05:00

2007-12-10T21:10:00.001-05:00

I wanted to make a list titled "things Hugsband says that sound psychotic." he had one really crazy day when everything he said was nutty. I only remember 2, but here's the list anyway.

1. "I can't hear you; I'm in my underpants."

2. "we have to collect baby jellyfish and put them into tubes."

one of those statements is actually true.

2007-11-29T11:29:00.000-05:00

thanks, Jake. I have been feeling a little overwhelmed with work and fun lately, leaving little time for things like this (part work/ part fun). I am "working from home" this morning in order to wait for a furniture delivery (hurry up, CB2, I want to get to work eventually!), which gives me a little extra time for work/fun things.

Hugsband's tae kwan do, or as I like to call it TKD, has been going very well. I am very impressed when I watch him. he takes the whole process very seriously and looks like he could kill someone when he's in action. when he's not in TKD action, he breaks into a sweet smile, encourages others in his class, and looks like he couldn't kill a bug. quite a juxtaposition. they broke boards last night. when he got home, I noticed that there was blood on his sock. apparently, he busted open his thumb and didn't realize until the blood started dripping down on his foot. he's hardcore like that. it's hard to believe he's only a white (baby) belt.

my mom and her new husband will be in arizona at christmas, so we're having a pre-christmas gift exchange at our place. I have never gotten very into decorating for the holidays, but I plan to get a tree and everything this year. this holiday season is exciting for several reasons: (1) for the first time in 10 years, we're not traveling!!!!!!!! (2) we own our house and decorating our own place is just more fun. (3) we have 2 adult-sized paychecks for buying presents and things. (4) many of my friends have had exciting developments that I get to help celebrate this season (engagements, babies, etc.). I even decorated Dougie, who recovered beautifully from surgery and is now more fat & fluffy than ever.

part of the celebrating we get to do involves our friends Janet & Jay, who live in MA but have family in chicago. they were here for a shower over thanksgiving weekend. I bought these socks that look like hi-tops for their baby boy (coming on or about february 1).

Rachel's New Update...by Jake

2007-11-27T21:59:00.000-05:00

Hello all.

I'm Jake, Rachel's goofy cousin. Sorry for the lack of updates. We went to eat good middle eastern food at Semiramis tonight and watched "House." Our holidays were good, she'll have more details at a later time.

Regards,
Jake.

2007-10-11T22:14:00.000-04:00

we've been in chicago for about 3 months now. obviously, we have been excited about being nearer to family and friends, but recently I've started to develop a few new favorite things about the city.

(no particular order)
1. the poorly rendered Obama painting on milwaukee ave
2. the closed restaurant on ashland that used to have a cool sign that said "HOPE DIES LAST" (also the title of a Studs Terkel book) and was replaced with "pizza shut"
3. the homeless, shirtless man on devon ave who wears a stethoscope
4. speaking of devon, the yummy indian food at uru swati
5. finding clothes and home furnishing that I love. it's easier for me in chicago than in any other city
6. watching Hugsband at Tae Kwan Do. last week I saw him spar with a 13-year old. guess who won.
7. the irving park ymca. barely redecorated since they opened in the 20's: same tile in the pool, same polish dudes in the lounge area, really sucky racquetball courts
8. living someplace where my friends are eager to come and visit
9. having a grown-up job, finally
10. sugar cane drinks, also on devon ave
11. the snack cart that comes down my street, selling mangoes and fried crunchy things that I haven't been able to order because I can't figure out what they are.

2007-09-22T12:38:00.001-04:00

I had a very depressing bus ride the other day. it started with one of the neighborhood homeless women boarding alongside me. her skin is the darkest shade of black, she appears to be mute. she moves from person to person seeking cigarettes, pantomiming the motion of smoking. I gave her a granola bar, which seems totally inadequate. once she got her cigarette, she spent the remainder of the bus ride shooing invisible flies from her face. it would be easier to ignore if I didn't know about mental illness. same trip, I overheard two teenage girls talking about their "lost babies". it was never clear whether they miscarried, aborted, or whether the babies died after birth. they spoke of it very casually, though, in the same way they later talked about doritos. usually, my head is buried in a book and I don't notice sad things that happen on public transportation. on this day, however, I felt very white, privileged and out of touch.

you wouldn't know it from the preceding paragraph, but I am happy to be in chicago. Hugsband and I have started playing racquetball again, which is awesome, and I have been developing some new research ideas that allow me a creative outlet and make my work much more interesting. we have a number of exciting houseguests coming in the next month or so, and we're working on vacation plans. see, aren't you convinced?

2007-08-25T19:26:00.000-04:00

so, you wanna see my new house? here are the areas that are clean enough to show on the internets:

the kitchen isn't going to stay yellow, but we both hate painting and it's taking a long time to get around to it. our dining room and bedrooms are starting to pull together, but there's more than needs to be done.

2007-08-05T13:19:00.000-04:00

I just spent 3 days in nashville at a conference for my new job. the training sessions were long and boring, but I met some nice people, including a new co-worker from chicago, and saw some former colleagues from new haven. we were able to enjoy ourselves quite a bit, thanks in no small part to our generous food allowance. I was in charge of finding fun and expensive places to eat. well, formally I wasn't in charge, but I took over pretty quickly. finding good restaurants is one of the things I do best. I ended up leading a group of 8 women on a long and trecherous walk through a rather industrial part of nashville to get to a wonderful resaurant, flyte . I am always amazed when people follow me, particularly people who don't even know me. I was very nervous along the way, thinking 'what if it's not open?', 'what if it sucks?', 'what if they can't accommodate our group?', 'how did we end up with so many people?' en route, a couple of the women seriously considered calling for a taxi to take them to a different restaurant and doubted there could actually be a decent restaurant at the end of our sweaty 45-minute walk. thankfully, when we arrived we were immediately seated at a kitchen table with a wonderful view of the grill and the finishing station. the food was wonderful, if a little precious, and we had a great time. there were a few unadventerous, picky eaters among us, but even they enjoyed the handsome waiter eye candy and admited that the place was worth the walk.

2007-07-25T19:15:00.000-04:00

I started doing the goodreads thing. if you like books and I haven't already strong-armed you into joining, you should sign up and be my friend. it is completely overwhelming to try and rate everything I have ever read, so I am trying to rate my absolute favorites and any books that friends include on their lists that I have already read. it's very fun and addictive.

2007-07-24T17:43:00.000-04:00

today Hugsband and I spent several hours at our local branch of the state of illinois dmv. the place was like a shrine to our secretary of state, Jesse White. his photograph was plastered all over the place. in fact, when I was searching online for information about the location/hours/etc., I had difficulty finding the official state website because it's called something like 'Jesse White presents cyberdrive illinois'. most of the individuals working at the northwestside dmv were quite friendly, including the ancient man who administered my written exam. he was covered in liver spots, had a parkinsonian tremor, and appeared rather unsuited to perform his job. he scored my exam by running one finger along the answer key and marking on the test with his other hand. unfortunately, his movements were uncoordinated, and his left hand was at least 2 items behind his right by the time he finished. needless to say, he was quite inaccurate with his scoring. somehow I still eeked by with a passing score (he marked 5 wrong).

we didn't go out to celebrate Hugsband's new job or the completion of my big, scary exam, but when we left the dmv with new licenses, plates, registration, and city stickers in hand, we both agreed that some sort of celebration was in order. can't celebrate tonight- Mom's coming over to have Hugsband's famous salmon and zucchini/goat cheese bread, but tomorrow night we're eatin' out!!

2007-07-17T07:32:00.000-04:00

we are back home, kind of settled in, and certainly enjoying our new place. there were some scary moments in the days before we closed on our new house. in fact, we were mid-move, half way through ohio when we found out that everything would be ok. phew! we do not want to move again for a long, long time.

Hugsband got a job, a really fun sounding job teaching kids and teachers about the fishes, so we can pay the mortgage.

I am taking my 4.5-hour, very expensive, high stakes licensing exam this morning. I hope I can remember all of the stupid facts I memorized over the last couple of months.

roller coaster

2007-06-27T08:20:00.000-04:00

the last couple of weeks in new haven:
I am finished with my on-call days in the emergency room. woo-hoo!
I played my last softball game with the child study center team. boo!
I have a really great job in chicago. woo-hoo!
we have to leave a bunch of people I really, really like. boo!
we will be close to my family and some of our oldest friends, finally, after 10 years away. woo-hoo!
we bought a great home. woo-hoo!
we am so far in debt that I can't even fathom it. ugh!
my nieces can sleep over. woo-hoo!
Hugsband doesn't have a job, although he does have two amazing interviews. probably woo-hoo!
we can get a dog. woo-hoo!

back in july.

2007-06-23T08:05:00.000-04:00

today is my 5-year wedding anniversary with Hugsband. we don't take those kind of things too seriously (for instance, often forgetting our anniversaries entirely), but Hugsband showed up at my office yesterday with this fabulous bouquet. it's the best I have ever received! today we're going to get massages at the hippie place down the street and then go out for indian buffet. it's very nice to have such a happy excuse to take a break from packing!

2007-06-13T10:19:00.000-04:00

we had a very rainy garage sale this weekend. in new england (or at least in new haven), garage sales are referred to as "tag sales." we set up on our porch and in our living room and sold like our lives depended on it. we made quite a bit of money and got rid of some clutter. I haven't quite adjusted to our post-sale lifestyle yet. I went to make plunge pot coffee this morning and realized that I didn't have a microwave in which to boil water. I then spent 10 minutes looking for the kettle I sold on saturday. then I pulled out the drip coffeemaker only to realize that we had no filters. agh!

2007-06-12T21:18:00.001-04:00

our softball manager/coach is comically hard-core. he yells at us, gets mad, and makes no effort to hide his disdain for women as softball players. and that is why the following email, which was circulated to all employees of the center where I work (>150), was so sweet.

All,
Our opening day game against Psychology was a see-saw battle played
out under an unsettled sky. The sky darkened as we first lost a
seven-run lead and then fell behind 14-11. But in the end, the
storm clouds passed and the Dreamers emerged with an extra-inning
15 to 14 victory.

Usually, an unwritten policy and modesty prevents mentioning the
names of specific players who play starring roles. Singling players
out can be difficult and can cause descension, even when done in
the most careful way.

However, given that the deserving player soon will be departing
the Center to assume a faculty position in Chicago, seeing as the
player will be with us for only two more games, and given the crucial
nature of her game-winning hard-hit RBI single, an exception can be
made and congratulations and a personalized acknowledgement
extended to Rachel ******.

see? it's very awesome.

2007-06-03T09:10:00.000-04:00

we had a very nice, albeit kind of long, "graduation" ceremony on friday. I have an attention span of about 2 minutes, so it worked out really well that I sat next to Lauren and was able to entertain myself with Jordan for much of the goings-on.

the graduation included a serenade by a whiffenpoof and lots of psychiatrists patting each other on the back. I still work for another month, without any slowing of duties or lessening of workload. Hugsband's parents flew out this weekend, which was very nice. they enjoyed the ceremony. although I think they were a little overwhelmed by the restaurants we chose to bring them to, we had a great time. I think they enjoyed meeting our new haven friends.

au revoir, new york

2007-05-27T18:03:00.000-04:00

we went into the city yesterday for our last hurrah. we still have another month in CT, but things will be too hectic to allow for a day in manhattan. so we grabbed our last chance while we could. it was a lovely day. we ate pasteries from bouchon, hung out in central park, and went to soho for ethopian food.

in the park, we went to the pond with the remote controlled boats. a world famous red tailed hawk (Pale Male) nests nearby atop a luxury apartment building. the nest is just across the street from Woody Allen. I have a book about him (the hawk). it's pretty amazing to see him thriving in the big city. we got some good looks at Pale Male, while he circled overhead. we had seen him one other time on our very first trip into the city, though that was before we we knew about his lore.

Hugsband's favorite part of the park is the turtle pond. these three pictures were taken there:

2007-05-24T08:55:00.000-04:00

it's not that I don't want to update. I don't not want to. there are many forces competing for my time these days: housing attorneys (actually, not competing enough and therefore requiring me/Hugsband to stay on them), psychological reports, neuropsych research protocols to score, licensing exam stuff, a garage sale to plan, a fat pack of paperwork from my new employer, selling my car, etc....

we took a break from our mounting stress levels last night and went to the season's first softball practice. I ripped it up last night, by which I mean no egregious errors can be attributed to me. I love the med school softball league. the team names are particularly great (e.g., the cognitive neuroscience "action potentials"). one of my colleagues suggested that we make team t-shirts that read:
[front] CHILD STUDY CENTER-- We don't spank children.
[back] But we'll beat your ass.

I was in DC last week and had a great time. I attended a mark-up session of the senate judiciary committee, and it was a little like a real-life daily show episode. the democratic senators were very funny, often at the expense of Orrin Hatch. the highlight came after Hatch read a particularly lengthy and BORING statement in a low and monotonous voice, and Russ Feingold said to Patrick Leahy, "Mr. Chairman, I would like to object to the passion with which that statement was read." Hatch countered with, "You want passion? I'll give you passion!" and proceed to read another boring statement in the same tired tone. ah, the hijinks! I was surprised to see how rarely the senators actually listen to each other; they spend a lot of time using blackberries, playing grab ass with other members of their party, and asking their aides what they should say next. I'm not in it, but here's a picture of Janet and Tracy trying to figure out how to get around capitol hill.

2007-05-09T19:53:00.000-04:00

now that it’s warm Hugsband and I have been riding our bikes and playing catch quite a bit. I realized something about our respective bike riding styles. Hugsband tends to go rather slowly, taking in the scenery. when he comes to a big hill, he shifts to a lower gear and goes even more slowly. I ride as fast as I can without scaring myself. when I come to a big hill, I ride really fast and try to get up it without breaking my stride and end up wearing myself out.

it's like a metaphor for our personalities.
** **
last night we walked to the atm. as we approached, I noticed that a man was standing right up against it, a bottle of old style and his keys were propped on a nearby ledge. I assumed he was drunk, then I realized that the man had a tremor and was not otherwise moving. Hugsband told him that we were calling for help and then I ran in to a restaurant and asked them to call 9-1-1. then the annoying part started.

every yokel in the nearby bars came out on the sidewalk to put in their 2-cents about how to handle an apparent seizure. one drunken young woman was particularly obnoxious. she waved her cigarette around and shouted out things like "put something in his mouth so he doesn't swallow his tongue" and "everybody move back and give him space". the latter appeared to be directed at the 3 adults who were, by this point, holding the man in a patio chair so that he did not fall to the ground and sustain a head injury.

there was also a suspicious pony-tailed man who referred to the atm guy as "Ed" and asked where Ed’s truck keys were located. then, minutes later, the same man acted as if he did not know the Ed’s name. I tried to tell a police officer, who arrived a couple of minutes later, that the pony-tailed guy was acting suspicious, but Hugsband told me that the police don’t need me to tell them who’s suspicious. (they might, though.)

the paramedics eventually arrived and took him away, and we never found out what was going on. the whole thing lasted about 10 minutes, so I doubt it was a seizure?

[insert dirty limmerick here]

2007-04-30T18:36:00.000-04:00

we're just back from nantucket. what a nice weekend! we went with the other postdocs, their spouses, a baby, and a dog. the daffodil festival was in full swing, and the gannets put on a good diving show. there were many yellow labs, seals and Kennedy-sounding accents. I have never seen so much old money and pastel pants. You know those chinos that are covered with embroidered martini glasses, turtles, or golf clubs? nantucket is where people actually dress like that.

I am going to miss the other postdocs. one of the hardest things about my education and training is the number of people we've had to say good-bye to. one of the most appealing things about returning to chicago is knowing that we will stay put for a long time to come. our offer on the condo was accepted; we'll be chicagoans by july 7!

2007-04-21T19:56:00.000-04:00

whew! there's a lot going on these days. I have been burning the midnight oil ("how can you sleep while the beds are burning?") trying to prepare for my licensing exam, writing reports, and coding research data. plus, we just spent a week in chicago looking for a place to live. we fell in love with 3 places but most in love with this one:

it's in a polish neighborhood on the northwest side of the city. we'll probably be making an offer this week, though the thought of taking out such a mammoth loan is terrifying. we saw every nook and cranny of chicy-g on this trip and met up with friends we haven't seen in years (hi, therese!). the culinary highlight of our trip was a 2-hour dessert extravaganza at tru , where Hugsband's buddy is a pastry chef and hooked us up with the v.i.p. treatment, including a kitchen tour!

id- emo- superemo

2007-03-28T09:01:00.000-04:00

it's been a hard week. I was Hugsband-less for the weekend. he went to kankakee for a wedding, and I was on call and stayed home. every time one of us travels without the other, we say "let's never part again". but we always seem to forget our vow. usually, I travel without him, which, if we have to separate, is the preferred arrangement for both of us. I can run around and do stuff, and he can stay home and watch movies. it's just the natural order of things. the best scenario, though, is when I bring him with me as I did when I went to Montreal.

we went to a rock-n-roll show monday night. we were the oldest people there by at least 15 years. the music was good, but I was distracted by the thought that I may see some of these kids at work. they're the same age as many of my patients. I mean, if one of them had tried to commit emo suicide last night, I would have been paged in to the emergency room. I mentioned this to Hugsband, and we somehow we ended up discussing how Freud's structure of the personality (id-ego-superego) may be altered in these kids: id-emo-superemo. if one were to successfully commit emo (ego) suicide, he would be left with only the superemo and id to battle it out. this idea is kind of entertaining because it's easy for me to picture what superemo looks like- quiet and serious kid, doesn't smoke, a modern day Ian MacKaye. and it's completely different from emo id-- he's the stoned kid in tight pants running around poking his friends with a vibrator (that really happened). it would be fun to see those 2 duke it out.

there's a tiny superemo and id in each of us.

2007-03-20T23:29:00.000-04:00

I have a new favorite game. it's easiest with 2 players. each player takes a turn thinking of a song that their opponent has to sing in the style of Daniel Johnston. I am surprisingly good at it.

2007-03-18T11:59:00.000-04:00

I reallocated 80% of my blog-updating time to cooking. at least that's what you might think if you didn't know that Hugsband does a great deal of the cooking. a more accurate statement, then, would be that I have reallocated 80% of my blog-updating time to eating.

it began with granola with cranberries and currants (I made that). it's really good with yogurt and strawberry jam. I have also been eating a lot of beans and bean-related legumes. the bean streak started with a lentil-basmati pilaf (I made that too) and continued on to hoppin' john and chili (both Hugsband's doing). last night we made caramel corn with cashews.

I have reallocated 80% of my blog updating time to dishwashing.

****

we had another nor'easter- about 6 inches of snow and ice. this time I couldn't crash Hugsband's snow day and stay home. I had to go to work like a responsible adult. I thought I was sick of winter, but I am enjoying this latest storm. it gets us out of any events that would require leaving the house which is always a good thing. plus, it is kind of nice to sit in my cozy kitchen all weekend and eat beans and caramel corn and work on reports. Hugsband spends his snow days watching movies and throwing snowballs at the squirrels who try to steal birdseed. to each his/her own.

there has been so much snow this year that we have fallen into a typical snow-day routine on those days when there's no possibility of driving anywhere. in addition to working on reports and throwing things at squirrels, we walk to the park to see if the storm has blown in any interesting birds. yesterday we saw a beautiful green-winged teal. the park is amazing on snow days, beautiful and nearly deserted.

++++

2007-02-26T21:40:00.000-05:00

you know those vacations that don't feel like vacation? like, they drain your soul and make you feel worse than before you had vacation, except now you're also behind at work. my week off was a bit exhausting. there were lots of fun parts, but my week may have been better spent farther away from home.

the following things happened (all true):
1. Hugsband was bit by a squirrel in boston commons (I have a picture of the culprit but am too lazy to upload)
2. his bite looks like a razor cut, and an MD friend of ours recommended a course of anti-biotics (no worry about rabies, though)
3. we went to see an opera version of the David Lynch film "lost highway"
4. it sucked
5. I was the (almost) primary caretaker for a preschooler and a toddler for a few days
6. it was very tiring and super fun
7. we bought 5 different kinds of dark chocolate
8. we ate turkish for lunch, greek & indian for dinner in manhattan
9. my clothes got tighter (not in any kind of sexy way)
10. I read a book about the red tailed hawks in central park

the end. back to work.

Jess, Lilly, and a peregrine falcon

2007-02-21T13:01:00.000-05:00

my nieces were here this week. we had a wonderfully exhausting time. I brought all of my toys home from work, and our house was one giant playroom. yesterday we took them to a children's ecological museum. we especially enjoyed the raptor rehabilitation program. we also took them (and their parents) to yale's peabody museum, a natural history museum. I spent a lot of time trying to explain pre-homo sapien hominids to Lilly, who is 4 and a half. I wasn't sure she quite got it. the next day she was telling one of my friends about what she had seen in new haven, and she referred to "the dead people museum 'cuz first there were dinosaurs, then different weird people, and then the real people like me."

while our guests were here, the resident Mr. Wizard conducted a series of science demonstrations.

they left this morning, and the house seems very quite without them.

snow day '07

2007-02-14T14:54:00.000-05:00

Hugsband and I enjoyed a snow day today. (technically, I don't get snow days, but if Hugsband is staying home all day, I am too! plus, I was on call last night and needed some extra rest today.) I should clarify, though. the precipitation wasn't quite snow. it was more like tiny painful ice cubes hurling through the air at 100mph. they didn't accumulate in an amorphous blob the way snow does, each cube remained distint. weird. we spent an hour and a half battling the elements in our neighborhood park and were rewarded with lots of good bird sightings: common and hooded mergansers, belted kingfishers, a young red-tail hawk, some unidentfied falcon (merlin?), and northern pintail ducks.

2007-02-04T18:55:00.000-05:00

I have big news:

1- Maxine, our rescue bird, was not warming up to human compansionship and seemed very lonely, so we bought a new bird and named her Francine. (Hugsband calls her '$20 bird', which discriminates her from Max, who is known as 'free bird' since we didn't have to pay to catch her outside.) we purchased Francine 2 weeks ago, and it seemed like a huge mistake at first. the birds hated each other and fought all day. I felt really guilty for making free bird's life even more miserable. then, suddenly today, they started cuddling and chirping sweetly to each other. it's really, really cute.

2- my mom smashed her face on the el when the train braked without warning. her nose was broken, and she had to have surgery. she's back to work and sounds fine now.

3- remember when I went to france with that family and ended up on a nude beach in the riveria for 2 weeks, and there were genital piercings and other weirdness ? well, I just found out that last summer the father stabbed the mother and then shot the judge from their divorce trial sniper-style and then was on the lam in mexico. he was on america's most wanted. now he's in custody. how crazy is that?! I can't believe it.

4- oh, and I got the job I wanted in chicago.

2007-01-20T12:21:00.000-05:00

I really should stop posting unflattering pictures of myself.

this morning we attended our first implosion. only, don't call it an implosion because Hugsband gets all bent out of shape. apparently, it's a controlled EXplosion.

2007-01-15T09:02:00.000-05:00

Gina asked how my lazer tag party was (I prefer the X-treme "z" spelling). it was f'ing awesome. I have never had so much fun in my life. that said, there was one low point that warrants mentioning. I got pistol whipped by a psychiatrist. I have heard people talk about "fat lips" all of my life, but this was my first first-hand experience. in addition to the puffy lip, one of my teeth fell out the next day. I keep waiting for someone to knock on the door to question Hugsband about his wife management practices.

and yet, I would do it all again for another game of laZer tag.

the assailant bought me 2 awesome books and some chocolate for bday gifts, so I didn't hold the aggression against her.

2007-01-07T09:46:00.000-05:00

we had a nice time over the break. my interview seemed to go well. (they bought me a falafel.) we visited with family and friends and picked up some good swag. there was one problem, though, our nieces have become very sassy in our absence. just look at this photographic evidence.

I have been busy since the start of the new year. busy planning my lazer tag birthday party for next weekend. I am totally stoked.

it's been a comedy-filled couple of weeks, with both my eyes and ears the recepients of fine entertainment. we've been listening to John Hodgman in the car. his audiobook is quite entertaining, and I highly recommend it. we both read the Karl Pilkington book, as recommended by Chris, and it was a very fun read. in fact, my riotous laughter was no doubt very disruptive to the other passengers on the flight back from chicago. one more thing-- while the following book is not very funny, I will stick it into this discussion for the sake of not ending up with more paragraphs than are truly necessary: geek love is one of my favorite books ever. not sure why I didn't read it sooner.

we haven't just been whooping it up and reading about circus freaks. we have been doing some serious work as well. last week I started taking calls in the children's emergency department at the hospital. this involves leaving bed in the middle of the night and spending a few hours working at what feels like a set from ER. it's very surreal. my only complaint so far is that taking call interferes with my usual home/food/gym/read/bed routine. I really like my routine. not sure what Hugsband is up to work-wise, but he leaves the house for 7-8 hours each day, leading one to assume that he has some sort of gainful employment.

an early happy birthday to Jake. I can't believe that someone I babysat and held as an infant is a full-fledged adult ( that is, if one can consider a wrestling fanatic an adult- hehe). not sure why I look so uncomfortable/crabby/tired in this pic. I can assure you that the upset look on my face has nothing to do with the company or the amazing restaurant, green zebra in chicago.

no wish for you

2006-12-16T12:23:00.000-05:00

Hugsband will be alone on his 31st birthday. it's on wednesday. I am leaving that morning for a job interview in chicago. it's only fair, then, that he get his gift early-- a customized zombie portrait from our good friend Chris. behold!

we had an early bday dinner at a turkish restaurant last night. at some point in the middle of our meal, I pretended to need to use the restroom and went to ask our waitress to bring out a bday surprise dessert. Hugsband's favorite turkish dessert is kadayif, which I don't know how to describe except that it's sweet and kind of crunchy but soggy. once our main course dishes were cleared, the waitress came out with some kadayif with a candle on top. I can be a little impulsive from time to time, like those brats with ADHD, except more charming. when the kadayif was placed on the table, I leaned forward, as if to blow out the candle myself. I realized my mistake just in time. I laughed and explained to Hugsband "I was about to blow it out!" and when I said those words, he scoffed at me and my impulsivity, and his scoffing extinguished the candle. thus crushing all of his birthday dreams of peace on earth and PS3's for all.

2006-12-10T14:11:00.000-05:00

we spent a couple of hours with Jordan the newborn last night. being with her is like being on a roller coaster. it's either totally awesomely fun or anxiety-provoking, in a 'oh my god, did I just accidentally crush her spine or something? is that why she's screaming like a banshee?' kind of way. her parents were so grateful for a night on the town that they brought us 3 different kinds of chocolate.

2006-12-05T19:00:00.000-05:00

Hugsband and I played hookey and went into the city today. we ate arepas and bought comics.

the social season at work has started up again. this pic is from the psychology department party. I have mandatory work parties from now until christmas. sounds pleasant, right? not so much. I get anxious at work parties. on one hand I have many co-workers I like and enjoy talking with. on the other, I always feel like I am supposed to spend time with established faculty and other well-connected types who totally intimidate me. I feel guilty if I stay in a corner and talk to the people I know and like, and it's scary talking to anyone else.

we had friends over last weekend, and I hope our guests weren't socially anxious when we forced them to play DDR. it was awesome.

2006-11-25T14:12:00.000-05:00

it's that time of year again. time for me to start bitching and moaning about wasting money on useless things for people. I really don't want to celebrate Jesus' birthday by buying $20 gender-specific gifts without a particular recipient in mind. I hate that game where everyone fights over the gifts, which are always malodorous (candles, lotions, potpourri), offensive (playboy calendars), or just plain silly (aluminium can crusher). I always want to end up with the items we purchased, packed and hauled for 1000 miles. but no, my purchases end up with some jerks who don't really want a new scarf or a mag lite because they'd rather smell like artificial raspberries or whatever. ugh!

it may not be evident from my current level of crabbiness, but we had a great thanksgiving. we had planned on volunteering at a restaurant that serves homeless and working poor families for the holiday. they had too many volunteers, though, so we just cooked all day. we made homemade bread, brussels sprouts, lentil loaf (which is not as disgusting as it sounds), braised baby onions, and a flourless chocolate cake with cinnamon whipped cream. for some reason the grocery store was like some kind of pick up joint on thursday afternoon. we go to this grocery store all the time, and it's not usually a problem. on thanksgiving, though, any time I strayed more than 2 feet from Hugsband, some creepy guy would appear and start talking to me. Hugsband had a similar problem with the ladies. weird. I didn't realize that we had become so hot with the 50-year old yankee set.

(when I typed "yankee", I accidentally spelled it "yankakee".)

2006-11-15T19:02:00.000-05:00

we went to america's stonehenge in new hampshire last weekend on the way back from maine. that's where I saw this. there was a real stone table, complete with ledges to drain the blood away from the surface. I got a little freaked out by the whole place and refused to go through a narrow stone tunnel that was alleged to have been constructed B.C., but Hugsband was very brave.

maine was great, though, as beautiful as we expected. we saw lots of great birds and visited the stonewall store. Hugsband ate a Maine-style lobster role, which is more of a lobster salad than the butter-soaked CT-style sandwich. we also hit a great grocery store in MA and bought tons of chocolate.

2006-11-01T08:22:00.000-05:00

this "costume" caused one 6-year old trick or treater to run and get her mother (a physician) to "come and help this hurt man".

in all we had approximately 4 million kids. we went through 8 bags of candy by 7:30 and had to turn off the porch light.

2006-10-28T09:48:00.000-04:00

did you know that Hugsband is becoming a manny in february? he will be taking care of Jordan , Jason L. and Lauren's baby, a few afternoons per week. they're already very cute together.

categories of disorders I would like to see added to the DSM-V

2006-10-25T18:20:00.000-04:00

1. teenagers in love
2. people who expect bumper stickers to change the world
3. the zombie-obsessed
4. women who wear uggs (a more serious disorder- women who color coordinate uggs and handbags)
5. the homeschooled

2006-10-19T19:57:00.000-04:00

Hugsband is tired of me pathologizing his zombie fixation. today he said, "not everyone thinks that an obsession with death is a bad thing. why, just today I read about an unrepentant necrophiliac." as if that were a persuasive argument in favor of watching horror films...

it is kind of fun for me to try to psychoanalyze Hugsband's love of the macabre (my current theory is an attempt at mastery over fears of bodily harm), though I am generally opposed to Freudian approaches to understanding behavior. I get particularly annoyed when a psychoanalytic colleague tries to interpret my vegetarian eating habits. according to Freudian tradition, vegetarians avoid meat as a way of supressing oral cannabilistic impulses.

so really, it's obvious why Hugsband and I are so in love. he loves zombies, and my inner zombie is struggling to get out.

2006-09-30T08:00:00.000-04:00

usually going to the grocery store is a routine that both Hugsband and I participate in. we think about what we want to eat in the upcoming week, we make an ingredient list, we shop. but sometimes Hugsband goes to the grocery store without me, midweek. I get inordinately excited when that happens. when I shop for myself, I am typically good at avoiding temptations and sticking to the list, with fresh veggies and hard-to-find cheeses as exceptions. when Hugsband goes, on the other hand, I never know what we're going to get. (most often he picks up something chocolatey, whether that something makes it home and is shared with me is another matter.) that brings us to thursday night. when I came home from work, we ate the yummy dinner he made and then started thinking about dessert. I knew Hugsband had run by the store on the way home from school, and I hoped in my heart of hearts that he bought ice cream as a surprise. as I went to ask him, my excitement impaired my ability to generate speech, and I asked "did you get surprise cream?"

sadly, he didn't. and I haven't had surprise cream in almost a month, which is surely a record for me.

2006-09-24T19:30:00.000-04:00

remember the episode of pee-wee's playhouse where PW makes a salad bar and says "eeeeew, brains" when he holds up some cauliflower? I love that story. I just made roast cauliflower from the restaurant AOC's recipe, and promptly ate about 3 cups of the stuff. what a wonderful dish. I am also making curried carrot & squash soup with lots of ginger, but that won't be ready until the cauliflower is long gone.

it's macoun apple season too. macouns are a new england specialty, and they're only available for a couple of weeks each year. they're tart and crunchy and don't keep for more than a week or so. we bought a bunch.

on the chicago job front, I have some possibly exciting news. one of the university medical centers is trying to create a job for me. if they find funding, it will be mine. I may be traveling to chicy-g in the next couple of weeks to meet with some docs.

we want to buy a home when we move. I have started obsessing about houses in the greater chicago area and have fallen in love with oak park, but I don't think it's affordable. Hugsband will be going back to school, so my increased salary will be offset by losing his. maybe I can commute from Hugsband's parents' basement in bradley? at some point in my life, I hope he and I are both earning full salaries at the same time. I wouldn't know what to do with myself. I imagine the 2-salary life might involve designer suits and expensive chocolate, but it may mean pet monkeys and our own pizza oven. really, I am fine with either lifestyle.

2006-09-17T07:43:00.000-04:00

Hugsband is sick and keeps annoying me with his throat clearing noises. I do worry a little that I infected him and somehow the cow feces is in his lungs. I did something strange and out of character last night. despite FDA warnings and my well-developed case of hypochondriosis, I served bagged baby spinach for dinner. I did cook it, though. I made a delicious take on welsh rarebit, with the baby spinach and some mushrooms incorporated into the cheddar sauce. the thought of that yummy, velvety sauce may be responsible for my willingness to eat the possibly contaminated veggie. cheese sauces, from a taco bell nacho to a pretentious froth of manchego, are my downfall. when I finish here, I will check on the medical research literature to see if e coli ever causes cold symptoms in whiny boys.

I started the job search process, in preparation for the end of my postdoc next june. once I edited the bejesus out of cv, my mentor started emailing it to "the big wigs" in chicago. there are exactly 2 big wigs in chicago, according to my mentor. he thinks that they will either (a) offer me a job, or (b) know of someone who will be very happy to offer me a job. thus, I will skip the entire process of responding to posted job openings. we're trying really hard to find something in chicago, to the extent that I am ignoring other parts of the country- even bloomington! in all, it's very scary to limit my options and leave the process in someone else's hands for the time being. but, I can't imagine more capable and well-connected hands to leave it in. at this point, too, I don't want to imagine living anywhere besides chicago. I never thought I would be so eager to forsake both the east and west coasts and be eager to get back to the middle!

2006-09-07T08:00:00.000-04:00

I have a pretty good excuse for being MIA for so long. Hugsband and I have spent every spare moment stalking an escaped budgie (parakeet) who has taken up with the house sparrows who frequent our backyard. for 3 weeks we watched him and made lame attempts to capture him in Elmer Fudd-style traps. as the weather became colder, I grew increasingly afraid that we wouldn't get to him before he developed a respiratory infection or was injured. we got him (her?), though. the capture was very dramatic. we were running around outside for over an hour. two neighbors we didn't know joined in to help. finally, Hugsband nabbed him in a bush by draping a kitchen towel over his hand and grabbing him from behind.

in the Chris Clark tradition of giving pets their own last names, we christened him "Max Duncan Duptin".

2006-08-21T16:57:00.000-04:00

I have been Hugsband-less since saturday morning. in his absense, I have spent an inordinate amount of time with our landlord, Abe. (Abe is an elderly polish man, who came to the u.s. after avoiding concentration camps by fighting in the resistance in russia. he killed a wolf with his bare hands while hiding in the russian forests.) yesterday Abe and I moved the bird feeders from the side of the yard to the middle. the hope was that the squirrels would not be able to continue their practice of eating all of the bird food by climbing up the fence and leaping onto the feeders, and we would more easily be able watch the birds from inside the house.

Abe and I have a rather shaky relationship. at times, he seems to really like me. at other times, he says rude things and makes no secret of the fact that he disapproves of the amount of housework that Hugsband does. when Abe sees him doing laundry or washing the floor, he asks, "where's your wife?" as if I am shirking my wifely duties. usually, Hugsband can honestly answer that I am at work.

after we moved the bird feeders, Abe asked to look in my mouth. since he makes dental appliances and false teeth for a living, I let him look. I wish I hadn't. he immediately noticed my bridge and spent 15 minutes telling me what an awful color it was. then, consistent with his long-standing pattern of finding the lowest possible price on sundry items-- even if it means he makes enemies in the process, Abe insisted that I get no further dental work without his prior consent. "I want know how much they tell you to pay, and then you don't pay it. you come to me, and I tell them how much you pay." the worst part is, I really need a new bridge and I don't want him to negotiate with my dentist. I just want to get my teeth fixed. Abe will certainly notice when I have new teeth, and he will undoubtedly be very angry that he wasn't consulted. just like he was mad when I bought potting soil and didn't just dig up the yard to replant my bromeliads. "americans are so stupid wasting money."

on the kind of plus side, the feeder move was a mixed success. we can see the birds much more easily than before, but those sneaky squirrels have already figured out how to scale the pole to get to the goods. another plus, the new feeder arrangement lured an escaped parakeet into the yard. she's taken up with a bunch of house sparrows, and I am determined to catch her before the summer is over and she freezes to death. if I could just figure out how...

by the way, Hugsband didn't divorce me or anything. he's visiting family in illinois. I think he should come home now, though. enough is enough! I have laundry that needs washing.

2006-08-16T18:18:00.000-04:00

here's a fruit of Hugsband's summer labor. one plankton. plankti? apparently, they're called zooplankton to distinguish them, as animals, from the other kind of plankton that are categorized as plants. annoyingly, the first syllable of "zooplankton" is not pronounced the same way as the place where animals are displayed in captivity, which is how I tend to say it. rather, it's pronounced "zooh-plankton". I think that sounds way dumber. what the heck is a "zooh"? Hugsband says sometimes you can see what they have been eating, and usually it's something orange. I can't believe that some people look at these things for a living. I prefer to operate on the macro level.

we spent a wonderful, tiring long weekend in northern california and enjoyed seeing many friends. the food, scenery, weather, and birds were amazing. I forgot how great the left coast can be.

Hugsband gets a haircut (and an extra special surprise)

2006-08-05T20:36:00.000-04:00

before

after

2006-08-03T17:08:00.000-04:00

I haven't actually died or anything, in case anybody's worried. I don't have the mental energy or organization to generate a coherent paragraph, so here's a fragmented perspective of my recent goings-on.

I went to the berkshires this past weekend with Hugsband and friends from work. while there, we came across the best ice cream EVER- mexican chocolate. it was spicy. Hugsband has been working 10-12 hours a day on a boat measuring plankton or something since we got back. I got a psych testing referral that said "suicidle". I love that. is the kid so bored that he wants to kill himself? it's a gazillion degrees in the shade. we got cable because our dsl was messed up, and now we watch tv again. I like to call the on demand stuff "encore" to bother Hugsband, and he gets really perturbed about it. I don't remember how that started. there's a whole new bunch of psychiatry fellows I work with, and some of them are pretty cool. I finally narrowed down my job search area to include only chicago and the greater chicago area. (no, that does not include the 60901/15/14 zip codes.) Hugsband and I miss Chris Clark, but he's too stubborn to come and visit. or poor. with the exception of the jaunt to the berkshires, I have been working straight through the weekends like I don't even realize it isn't a weekday. then on sunday, I get really pissed that the weekend is gone. I can't complain too much, though, because I get to go to napa at the end of next week. the end. love, rachel

2006-07-19T19:19:00.000-04:00

boss of the psychiatrists: hey, Rachel, do you know the name of that movie? the one about the boston ax murderer?

rachel: you mean the boston strangler- is there a movie about that?

b.o.t.p.: no, this crazy guy takes an ax to people...

rachel: I don't know what that is.

b.o.t.p.: he lives in a house in the woods, and he attacks people...

rachel: you mean texas chain saw massacre?

b.o.t.p.: yeah, that's it.

see, Hugsband teaches me valuable life lessons that help me at work.

2006-07-10T21:43:00.000-04:00

ah, yes. I forgot to mention that when I returned from vacation I was returning to something new and scary- the inpatient psychiatric unit. it's taking up a lot of my time and energy, but I am learning new things like how psychopharmacology can affect bilirubin and have anticholergenic effects. just last week I had no idea what those things were.

2006-07-02T19:20:00.000-04:00

today is the last day of my week off from work. I don't do stay-at-home vacation very well. Hugsband is great at it- he can lounge and waste time with the best of 'em, but I prefer to travel or stay busy if I am not working. once my in-laws left on wednesday, I spent the remainder of the week melting chocolate to pour on things (strawberries and bananas, mostly), reading links from Chris' addictive new blog (top5daily.blogspot.com), and asking Hugsband if I was doing a good job not doing work. the answer was always no because I never really stopped for a whole day.

2006-06-29T08:44:00.000-04:00

from a piece in the nyt about the fashion in 'devil wears prada':

"Did he hit his mark? To a point. But to the unforgiving eye of insiders who attended a flurry of advance screenings, Andy's swag-laden trip to the ball has about as much relation to reality as New York City does to Kankakee."

in fact, this very week I took two people who rarely leave the greater kankakee area to new york city for a short trip. I can tell you from my in-laws perspective, those two places have NOTHING in common. The rude NYC fashionistas totally panned my in-laws attire and pelted them with comments like, "where'd you get those cropped pants, northfield square mall." seriously though, my mother in law can make friends anywhere. within a few short hours in the big city, she was hanging out with David Carradine in the hotel lobby chatting about the kung fu days. the algonquin hotel was awesome, and I highly recommend it. the location is central, the rooms are quite comfortable, and the place oozes literary history. it was good enough for Dorothy Parker and William Faulkner; it's good enough for you.

one terrible thing happened on our otherwise wonderful trip. Hugsband's mom rode in a cab for the first time in her entire life. we made it about 4 blocks before the cab careened into a pedestrian, throwing her to the ground. not a good first experience.

dogs don't reallly hear that well

2006-06-22T21:38:00.000-04:00

Hugsband and I have both fallen in love with Carl, who lives across the street. when we see him standing on the porch or in the grass, we whisper his name (quietly- to avoid upsetting the people he lives with) and try to lure him over to our yard with promises of well-prepared steaks. tonight, I saw Carl and the woman who lives in his house and I whispered from across the street, "Carl, we are your real parents." he didn't even look in our direction.

all hail Queen ChimChim

2006-06-10T14:56:00.000-04:00

I saw a new dentist last night, who is clearly an east coast native. he speaks like an upper-class bostonian and referred to sailing on more than one occasion. he bears a striking resemblance to the senior senator from massachusetts and even seemed a little tipsy. most concerning was the dentist's appalling disregard for OSHA regulations. at one point, when describing implanted false teeth, he gestured to his own mouth and tapped his teeth with his latex-gloved hand. when he pulled his hand away, a trail of saliva followed it. said hand was returned to my mouth mere seconds later.

by itself, the Ted Kennedy dentist is not that remarkable, but when it's consdered alongside the shock wave of yankee culture that continues to overwhelm me, it's worth talking about. for example, when I was up to bat at softball last week, I could actually see a polo match in progress. the kids across the street are outside playing lacrosse right now. we're on our way to an afternoon party, and the directions to the home were "pass the marina and look for the white colonial". it's like a yuppie overload that my working class system is not prepared to handle. I want to act like a robot and say "does not compute" the next time some parent tries to talk to me about prep schools.

one of my 3 favorite grad school friends of all time, ChimChim, just told me that she got a kickass clinical faculty position at columbia!! (and I promptly called the other 2 favorite friends and shouted the news into their voicemail before ChimChim could do so herself). columbia is a short train ride from my house!! it's all very exciting.

ChimChim's real name is remarkably similar to that of another grad school friend, so Hugsband dubbed them "ChimChim" and "JoJo" to better differentiate. amazingly, neither protested, and I continue to use these monkey-sounding names to this day.

2006-06-04T17:23:00.000-04:00

Hugsband and I have been running around and doing a lot of stuff these days. we threw a kickass brunch on memorial day, we both started playing in a softball league on tuesday, Hugsband took his students to manhattan to see hairspray on wednesday, and we spent thursday through saturday in montréal. phew! the highlight of brunch (besides my sweet potato and zucchini frittata) was the game of catch that followed. a couple of the other psych fellows, Hugsband and I were excited to throw the ball around in preparation for our first game against "internal medicine". I am somewhat over-confident in my team's ability to win. the other teams just sound so amazingly dorky that there's no way they can compete. sure, we're called the "dreamers", which is a lame Freud reference, but the team from cognitive neuroscience calls themselves "the field potentials". that name is so geeky that if you merely understand the reference, you're a dork. pharmacology, on the other hand, may pose a real threat. there's a real chance that their players have access to performance enhancing drugs.

we drove to my autism conference in canada. the frustrating thing about québec is that every time I am there, I get all jazzed up to use my french. as soon as the store clerk or waiter or hotel concierge hears his beloved language butchered with a chicago-area accent, however, he starts speaking english to me. I mean, really! how am I supposed to learn? I need practice. I took 5 semesters of french in college taught by a native parisienne who earned her doctorate at the sorbonne, yet I still speak with the accent of my terrible teacher from bradley, illinois. ("bone jur, lah claaaaas.") the drive home from montréal was particularly nice. on an impulse, we stopped at a roadside hummingbird/butterfly zoo just outside the city. it turned out to be a small but beautiful place to spend an hour. then, in vermont, I had a great pizza (vidalia onion/cheddar/broccoli/garlic/no sauce), and we went to the ben & jerry's factory.

2006-05-21T10:34:00.000-04:00

finally, a reasonable solution to our nation's obesity epidemic was proposed at our local sandwich/ice cream shop.

yesterday, we went to see the cricket hill peony farm. it was gorgeous and fun for our whole family, by which I mean both of us and not including Doug, the ferret, who would have run off and not really enjoyed anything about the farm except the sweet freedom of being outside of the house. I enjoyed the spectacle of the beautifully scented flowers, while Hugsband spotted bullfrogs, snakes and turtles in the farm's pond.

2006-05-18T11:46:00.000-04:00

Hugsband is going to teach sex ed to his school's 5th grade boys next week. in preparation, he watched the video that the school shows students each year. we were dismayed to see that the video is from the mid-80's and was produced by the good people at 3-2-1 contact. surprisingly, the information covered in the video is still current- menses still consists of tissue shed from the lining of the uterus and such. even more surprising, the hosts of the video do a wonderful job discussing sexual orientation, masturbation, contraception, and other critical topics that have the potential to send parents into a frenzy.

at the school Hugsband and I both attended, sex ed was taught by the gym teachers, not the science teachers. I am not sure whether it's true or not, but when we (the 5th grade girls) met up with the boys in the cafeteria following sex ed instruction, the boys told us that the coach used a baseball analogy to explain penile-vaginal intercourse. that is, the girl is like a catcher's mitt and the boy is like the baseball.

2006-05-13T18:25:00.000-04:00

I learned a lot in washington this week: people in libertarian think tanks don't like it when you ask challenging questions; Barack Obama is really tall and has free jelly beans in his office, Hillary's staffers spend hours on the phone saying things like "if that's a concern, you may want to call the office of your senator from Missouri. senator Clinton represents the state of new york" and "the senator does not believe in amending the constitution"; according to other democratic staffers, they have to do and say what Ted Kennedy's staffers tell them; people on the hill who haven't been in a classroom since entering adulthood can call themselves "special education experts"; and finally, people in DC focus on breadth, not depth, when learning about issues, so they don't know too much about anything.

I saw Chuck Norris in the lobby of the hart senate office building.

2006-05-07T21:45:00.000-04:00

I just received a rather upsetting comment on my owl post. apparently, I can buy ANY college degree from a man named Harold. the degree takes only 2 weeks. damnit, Harold. what lousy timing you have! my graduation was yesterday. I didn't actually attend, but I still graduated and do not need degrees now. where were you 5 years ago when I started this stupid process, Harold? or, the years of study before that? Harold, where were you when I was in grades 13- 25? you could have saved me years of learning things and writing papers.

this is a busy travel time. we went into NYC yesterday, and I am going to D.C. for a "policy trip" on wednesday. I don't know what I am supposed to do in washington, exactly, but the group I am traveling with will get to meet policy makers, eat in the senate cafeteria and talk with folks from think tanks. at the end of the month, we're heading to a schmantzy hotel in montreal for a conference and then to the pennsylvania wilds for a rustic cabin vacation with Hugsband's family. so, if you're planning a visit to the Hugsband/Wifey hotel, you'd better call ahead.

we purchased bakery items at 3 establishments in the city yesterday: a sticky bun in the morning, gooey cookies in the afternoon, and another cookie (Hugsband) and lemon macaroon (me!) in the evening. add to that a fancy dinner and a yummy picnic lunch by the turtle pond in the park, and you have a recipe for a lovely, albeit fattening, spring day!

Ilona, we forgot to bring the g.c.!! we have plans for another trip soon, though.

2006-04-25T15:21:00.000-04:00

also, there were baby owls out near the indian caves in kankakee. this photo was taken through our binoculars! just to be silly, we typically pronounce "binoculars" in the british way (buh-nock-lee-urs). when our friends were here from london, it was awkward because we kept pronouncing it their way and I thought they would think we were making fun (which we were but not of them, specifically- of their whole people). really, though, I don't think they noticed.

2006-04-22T09:57:00.000-04:00

we just returned from kankakee and are several pounds heavier than when we left home. it's inevitable. that place is like some kind of [insert appropriate astrophysics term here] that, rather than sucking out life force, deposits fat onto it's target.

I call this picture Hugsband's singles ad. when I finally kick the bucket or run off with a real french guy, he should use this picture to get all of the kind hearted ladies. I even wrote the ad for him:

Sweet teddy bear-like SWM likes kittens, rainbows, and cuddles. Let's watch America's Funniest Animals together. NS/ND

2006-04-08T14:49:00.000-04:00

even though some of the results are highly embarrassing (wild boys, anyone?), I cannot resist posting this meme. the responses were generated by putting my ipod on shuffle. I think I will start asking my therapy clients to do this as well. it can help us get to the meat of the issues so much faster than traditional talk therapy. I mean, how many years on the couch would it take before I realized that people secretly lust me to the tune of stevie? I mean, I have hoped that was the case, but one can't be sure of these things.

How does the world see you? Hung My Head- Johnny Cash
Will I have a happy life? Reel Around the Fountain- the Smiths
What do my friends really think of me? Wild Boys- DuranDuran
Do people secretly lust after me? Uptight (everything’s alright)- Stevie Wonder
How can I make myself happy? Viva anger, Viva Hate- Rainer Maria
What should I do with my life? Static- Jawbox
Will I ever have children? Bam Thwok- the Pixies
What is some good advice for me? Lovely Day- the Pixies
How will I be remembered? So Watcha Want- the Beastie Boys
What is my signature dancing song? Fight Test- the Flaming Lips
What do I think my current theme song is? Nearer to Thee- Sam Cooke
What does everyone else think my current theme song is? Time is on my Side- Irma Thomas
What song will play at my funeral? All these Governors- the Evens
What type of men do you like? Stop Playing Guitar- the Promise Ring
What is my day going to be like? On the In- Honcho Overload

"it smells the way I feel about birds"

2006-04-08T08:12:00.000-04:00

Hugsband is in the berkshires-- another place I had heard of but didn't quite understand until we lived in new england, like nantucket (which, apparently, is not as adult-themed as the limericks suggest). without him here and left to my own devices, I made a fool of myself last night and uttered the above quote. I was joking, of course, but the people I was with already love to tease me about my bird obsession, and they know enough about psychology to make it sound very pathological. last night was still fun, as I met another spy! I say "another" because I count my cousin kristin, a former cia employee (not the culinary institute of america, either), as the first, even though she'll tell you she was an administrative assistant or some crap like that. a group of us had a yummy dinner, and the spy told stories that started with phrases like "I know this guy in djibouti who fasted for 30 days" and "when I observed ramadan in yemen...". after dinner, he ordered a bourbon.

so about that quote, on the way to dinner, Janet asked about the source of the delicious, cinnamony smell in my car, and I told her it came from my bird-shaped air freshener. when she complimented the smell, I commented that it doesn't really smell like birds, but it smells the way I feel about birds.

midwest - new england dictionary

2006-04-06T19:37:00.000-04:00

thousand island dressing = russian dressing

garage sale = tag sale

cart = carriage

purse = pocket book

bun = hard roll

pop = I don't know, but I am sure it's not pop

"ant" (your parent's sister) = "ah-nt"

the kids find the last one especially funny. today I was telling a kid a story about an imaginary character who had to go live with his "aunt donna," and he started cracking up and said, "he went to live with a bug?"

the idiots down the street who have had an easter flag flying since june finally seem slightly less stupid. I mean, who has an easter flag, really? I get quite mad at people who decorate for the seasons and then, months later, have made no move to remove the decorations. there are still several christmas wreaths in the neighborhood. it's damn infuriating. if you have the time and inclination to hang crap on your house, you should also have time and inclination to take that stuff DOWN.

2006-04-02T21:00:00.000-04:00

rat
Originally uploaded by loftindupuis.

we went into the city with Ilona and Steve today. the weather was beautiful, the londoners they introduced us to were nice, and I ate yummy french food. a lovely day all around! Hugsband even managed to garner compliments on his t-shirt in both marc jacobs (pictured here) and in our favorite chocolate shop. I'm sure it's gratifying when 2 seconds of hard work to create an outfit by picking up clothes off of the floor and putting them on pays off.

england, meet new england

2006-03-30T23:17:00.000-05:00

Ilona and Steve are here from london, and they keep giggling about the English names of the towns. it's especially amusing to them that the city of new london has a river called the thames. they also find it riotous that shopping carts (trolleys, to them) are called "carriages" here. speaking of stupid things to say, Hugsband has a student who refers to facial tissues as "puffs." that's infinitely dumber than calling them "kleenex." he's from the south, though, so there you go.

2006-03-22T08:02:00.000-05:00

I am better. I am a good, productive worker again. Hugsband is laid up now, and I may have also infected Kara, who was here visiting at the beginning of my illness. I feel so powerful and wish I had enemies to ensicken, except now that I am well my power to inflict sickness may gone. I need to test it. I also feel guilty. Hugsband never catches my colds and flus, so as a joke, at the height of my fever/sweating/coughing, I kissed him right on the lips. it seemed funny at the time. oops.

Hugsbandly tidbit: on his desktop, there is a folder labeled "albinos." it contains about 15 pictures of albino animals. every once and awhile, he makes me look at all of the animals while he oooohs and ahhhs. I guess, it's more of a giggle, point, and "look at that whitey" than an oooh or ahhh. when we got our first computer together, he downloaded a video clip of a monkey touching his ass, smelling the hand with which he touched said ass, and falling out of the tree. he watched it at least once a day, often laughing to the point of tears. there's always something odd or disgusting or adorable for him to force me to watch. last night he was feeling somewhat better and started to show me new bigfoot footage, but he quickly lost interest and went to lay back down. get better, Hugsband; I haven't been forced to watch anything stupid in 2 days.

2006-03-15T21:15:00.000-05:00

I am recovering from a crazy sickness that caused me to sweat through my clothes. I even soaked my coat, which was super heavy when I went to take it off. my clothes were wet for 36 hours. I know because when I got home all sweaty, I dumped them on the floor. then last night when I finally felt well enough to put them away, I realized that they were still wet. I never realized what Ferris was going for with the whole sweaty palms thing, but now I get it- cold and clammy!

yesterday I slept for 5 hours during the day. I also watched 'send me no flowers.' it's really the perfect sick-day movie, rife with hypochondria and cocktails.

owl pellet

2006-03-12T10:15:00.000-05:00

owl pellet
Originally uploaded by loftindupuis.

when we were in corpus christi, Hugsband found this owl pellet. when he examined its contents, he found a rodent skull and other assorted bones.

2006-03-07T21:08:00.000-05:00

I just realized that in 'the secret of n.i.m.h.' the letters refer to the same agency that provides lots of funding to people at work. in fact, n.i.m.h. has paid my bills in the past. somewhere in my building, there are even rats. rats who are trying to learn to be autistic so the bad n.i.m.h.-funded dudes can take out their brains and see how they work. on a related note, if someone in the autism clinic talks to you about d.m.r., don't assume that they mean dexy's midnight runners because the department of mental retardation comes up a lot in conversation over there. also, if you search dexy's midnight runner in google without the apostrophe or the 's' at the end of runners, the first thing that comes up was written by Chris Clark, I surmise.

deafness is cute

2006-03-01T21:16:00.000-05:00

at the mexican restaurant where we often eat dinner on weeknights, there is a box trivia cards on each of the tables. after the hostess seats us and leaves the room, Hugsband runs from table to table and gathers all of the cards from the blue deck, the original trivial pursuit deck, and replaces them with whatever crappy cards were our table to begin with (baby boomer, usually). we then read each other questions while waiting for our food.

in this context, the following interaction transpired:

me- what's the capital of switzerland?

him- (very long pause) uh, oslo?

me- nope. that's norway.

him- what?! that's the name of a city? norway, are you sure?

me- no, oslo is in norway.

him- and it's a city in switzerland?

me- no, oslo is in a different country and that country is called norway. I think the answer is zurich. (looking at back of card) no, it's bern.

him- did you say 'burn'? like you knew zurich so you totally burned me?

me- yes

2006-02-26T20:21:00.000-05:00

in the wee hours of this morning, we returned from a trip to san antonio, austin, and houston. astoundingly, I spent time in san antonio and did not venture anywhere near the alamo. before we left connecticut, I complied a list of hilarious jokes about the basement and bikes and the like. yet, I told not a single one. since I have no picture of me with a tour guide at the alamo, here is a very old shot of me near one of the dinosaurs from the sunrise scene. [insert Pee-Wee laugh here]

we had a nice time on vacation, and I did an impressively good job of not working or thinking about work until we were stuck on a layover at o'hare for 3 hours last night. it's quite frustrating to be an hour from most of my favorite people in the world and not get to see them, but I did write the bulk of a psychological report during the wait. so, I guess it all worked out.

I won't go into detail about the birds we saw on the trip*. suffice to say that a conservative estimate of the number of species we spotted is in the low 90's. nearly a third of those were birds we have never seen before. it was like bird nerd heaven in texas. more important than birds, at least ostensibly, we saw good friends around the state. Joe and Krys seem to be doing well in san antonio, and it was wonderful to spend time with Kristin in houston. in a happy turn of events, we will get to see all of the texas people again this summer when they travel to connecticut or nyc!

* of course I will. if you call me, we can talk for hours. I will read to you from the list.

2006-02-12T13:43:00.000-05:00

we're snowed in today. there are huge drifts everywhere, causing Hugsband's tiny sporty car to look like a giant white station wagon. since we're trapped indoors, I have had an excessive amount time to think about my life. after hours of careful consideration, I realized that I am not living up to my full potential. I need a change in environment, I need to make a real difference in the world. my heart's cockles are not sufficiently warmed by working with babies with disabilities. very soon, I will abandon my current crummy career path and pursue the worthy cause of full-time baby wood duck rescuing.

don't tell my boss yet, though. I need to play it cool until I get a letter of rec.

2006-02-11T18:33:00.000-05:00

we were held captive on a 5 hour bird watch this morning, which wouldn't have been terrible except we’re in the midst of a frigid nor'easter and we didn't have any snacks. we found ourselves in a carpool with two friendly yankees, who were dead set on spotting a golden eagle- no matter how long it took to find one. apparently, the 10+ bald eagles, harriers, and multiple other raptors we spied weren't good enough for them. a benefit of the exhaustive trip, besides the birds, was driving through some adorable little villages we otherwise would never have known existed. the other birding highlights (as if anyone besides us would care!) may have been the long-tailed ducks and the loons, which are surprisingly elegant for birds with such a silly-sounding name.

the highlight of any bird trip for me is the people-watching. my favorite of this trip was a WWII-era navy man whose methods of birding are all related to military strategy. "form a caravan and we'll drive up to Essex as a group. that way, we're less vulnerable to accidents and mishaps."

2006-02-01T18:49:00.000-05:00

science fair b.s. is ruling Hugsband's life these days. there's a lot of drama surrounding a middle school science fair, especially for the teacher who is responsible for selecting the students who proceed to the city-wide fair. you wouldn't believe the name-calling, back-stabbing, and general funny stuff that goes on. the jerk at the district office can't keep her administrative nose out of Hugsband's teacherly business. all I remember about my junior high science fair is loaning my cousin Joel's far side book to a cute 7th grader who now lives in my house and leaves his disgusting shoulder hairs all over. I mean really! how do they even get into the fridge?

if this were a rorschach, I would get a special score for the preceding paragraph. it's true, though.

2006-01-23T21:05:00.000-05:00

when I work 12 hour days, 6 days a week, all I want to do is come home and watch TV dramas that say something to me about my life. damn the bastard TV. this week (and last) we're watching far too much House. I shouldn't be allowed to get TV episodes on DVD because I can't dole them out in a sensible fashion. it's like ice cream- all or none. at any rate, I decided that House is the show that most closely depicts my current job. there are "fellows" on House. I am a fellow! there's an ivy-covered medical school teaching facility on House. hey, that's where I work, kind of! House gets the tricky cases that other facilities can't figure out or have misdiagnosed. just like us!! we have 4 fellows- House has 3!

and while I have an eccentric and brilliant mentor (who is an addict just like House [though a cigarette addiction doesn't carry the same stigma as House's vicodin]), he's no misanthrope. he's a people person, and everyone loves him. and that's where my little fantasy falls apart.

p.s. Hugsband is grading science fair reports, and he said that several of his students thanked stores in the acknowledgements section of their papers. as in: "I would like to thank Stop & Shop Grocery for having all of the materials I needed." why didn't I think of that when I wrote up my dissertation? will the sporting goods store where I bought my golfer's wrist counters ever forgive me?

2006-01-07T10:52:00.000-05:00

hey, guess what?! I am "on the short list" of applicants for a faculty position at a fancy pants midwestern university. if I get it, I can spend a year and a half obsessing about finding a house and learning about my new town rather than spending the next year and a half obsessing about finding a new job. isn't that rad? also, fancy pants u is just a short (but not too short) drive from all of our family.

2006-01-01T22:07:00.000-05:00

jesse&lil action
Originally uploaded by loftindupuis.

we spent time with our nieces over the holidays. we also visited friends with kids. I am still recovering from the exhaustion. the problem is with me- not with the babies. I don't know how to stand back and observe the kids and continue with adult conversation. I can only interact in full spastic mode, throwing kids and screaming. somehow I do fine at work when I have a little one to test or therapize (you wouldn't know that word- it's only for those of us in the biz). but in a purely social situation, however, there are no holds barred. and it doesn't end until I have a backache and am hoarse.

2006-01-01T10:06:00.000-05:00

jd&whitey
Originally uploaded by loftindupuis.

ah, brave little Hugsband! he must have been very bad this year. look at the lump of coal santa brought him.

2005-12-22T21:35:00.000-05:00

tonight Hugsband went to a personal training session at our gym. it was one of those free-with-membership deals. he really wasn't interested, but I booked sessions for both of us when I was working out last week. when he walked in tonight, he was assigned to a tan, buff lady named Tammy. she was clearly unprepared to deal with a man who lacks gym savvy. during each commercial break of the melrose place rerun I watched on the treadmill, I watched Tammy kick Hugsband's ass. she told him "you have very broad shoulders" and had him curling Popeye-sized barbells. those broad shoulders must have misled her into thinking that Hugsband is actually a strong man. oh no, Tammy. underneath strong-looking Hugsband is a fragile, possibly anemic, definitely pale and squishy underbelly of pure geek.

about half way through their session, I noticed Hugsband walk into the locker room. several minutes later, he sheepishly emerged and returned to Tammy. afterwards, he admitted that he nearly fainted and had to sit on a locker room bench for several minutes to gather the nerve to face Tammy again. on our way out of the gym, I thought I would make a joke of it, so I smiled at Tammy and said "hey! what did you do to my husband?" she looked at me with complete unsmiling seriousness and said "I worked him hard". we barely made it of the building and into the parking lot before we dissolved into giggles.

birthday boat

2005-12-22T15:47:00.000-05:00

birthday boat
Originally uploaded by loftindupuis.

Hugsband is 30 today

2005-12-20T08:12:00.000-05:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HUGSBAND!!!! I bought him 2 books and will take him out for sushi tonight. I am terribly impulsive about giving him gifts. when the books arrived last week, I made him open them right away. now there's no gift for today. I think he's already finished both. he was very disappointed and angry after reading 'the zombie survival guide' (that may not be the exact title). apparently, the author knows little about zombies. Hugsband was especially disconcerted by the assertion that one should not hide in a boat when avoiding the undead because zombies can climb up the anchor and its chain to attack. he screamed, "if they don't have the gross motor skills to climb a fence, how are they going to scale an anchor chain?" he hurled the book at my head and I had to duck out of the way to avoid it. I think the guide was meant to be a humorous work of fiction, rather than the bible Hugsband was looking for.

speaking of which, we got in trouble at a screening of narnia because when they showed Aslan dead on the stone, I whispered, "don't worry. he'll come back as a zombie and then this movie will get good." and we giggled too loudly and it never did get good.

2005-12-18T12:55:00.000-05:00

time-warner
Originally uploaded by loftindupuis.

Hugsband is reading Stephen Hawking again and keeps saying things to me like "do you want to hear something that will totally blow your mind? the universe is expanding 5-10% every billion years. now here's the wacky part: that's 5-10% of infinity!!" thoughts like that give me a headache.

Tracy and I went into manhattan yesterday and ate chocolate and did not talk much about the universe, though she did tell me about her interesting, independently developed religious beliefs. that was kind of mind blowing. her beliefs are an interesting cross of gnosticism and some book she read that may or may not be entirely fictional. she wasn't sure. nevertheless, her beliefs were thoughtful and well reconciled with science. also, we had red and white sangria in a tapas restaurant.

Hugsband spent 3 hours playing ping-pong while I was gone. he and a friend are planning to join a table tennis league and are looking into special gear, like table tennis shoes. I am not even making that up.